just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
