shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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