Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
