Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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