We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
