Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
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