it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
