If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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