I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
