Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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