You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
