kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
