brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
