Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
