How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Randomize
