hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
