I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
