Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
