I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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