South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
