Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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