walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
