Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
