Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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