Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
