I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
