No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
