I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
