Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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