Don't you send me to vm
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
