It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Buhtt sex?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
