Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
