Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize