How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
