it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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