Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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