i was born a porn star she said
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
