Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Fuck me I smell like cheese
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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