my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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