smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
