There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
This show inspires me to have sex in space
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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