Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
