she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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