My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
