idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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