whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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