I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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