Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize