I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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