Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I cockslap morals
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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