What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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