I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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