I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
